Just realize that I m super busy in 2025

Obviously I can't imagine that 2025 just gone in a blink. 

Lot of thing need to do keep delayed in this year, and still, not yet done. 

I m too concentrate on working in 2025, didn't take a holiday at all whole year. 

And finally, in December of 2025, I got bad condition in health problem.

My throat got bad infection, take whole month to cured.

My blood pressure getting higher, I start to feel bad sometimes almost faint while stress.

I m lack of exercise for long time, my heart getting weak.

I can't continue life like this, I need make some change.

First, plan every meal, lucky that I didn't care lot about eat, once it can fill my belly that is good food.

Second, get working on my body, I started fast walking from beginning 2026 while I reach home from office at 1930. Almost a month that I drawing path on map using apps, now is getting good that I got little by little improve my stamina, but still far away from marathon level, and that's my target.

Third, sleep early, I keep forget time at night cause I really love midnight quite environment cause this can make me concentrate very good and accidently I work until 2 or 3am, and I gotta wake up on 7 next morning, that's mean I lack of sleep.

Now just step in February, almost Chinese New Year again, got more relax time on this month.

After CNY will get a full body check to make sure everything in control.

Hope getting good in future, for all, for whole human mankind.

Just having patch on my tooth this morning that pain me few months.

Time flies

Bad thing that too concentrate on working, I didn't realize that this year flies extremely fast.

As I mention "might take a long leave from my company" from last post ... 

I think that's impossible again this year.

Main problem is lack of money.

Is so struggle to afford a house with my current income.

I got saving every month, but that just a little bit of money.

Just because almost every month got some extra expense on car repair, roof repair etc.

>I can't escape this vicious cycle.

Mom keep asking me when to marry my girlfriend.

Or though my girl friend didn't care a lot marry or not, she just like to keep current relation together.

Ya ....... I didn't plan to have a kid anymore, even I quite love playing with kids.

Money is everything now days.

Life is hard.

Almost 40 years old man.

But still, life goes on.>

( ' v ' )

Step in 2025 just like normal day as usual

 Getting aged, just feel nothing surprise anymore for new year.

May be I m just too busy, too concentrate on my job, even forgot to apply leaves to enjoy some travel.

Time getting fast as aged, earn money getting hard, my new house still no yet done renovate.

Just hope I can move in my new house in 2025.

May be I m too concentrate on working, I lost many interest motivation on my hobbies.

This is bad, getting less thing to reduce stress, just feel lost something inside me.

I decide this year might take a long leave from my company, enjoy good travel as earn some fresh experience and memories.

Ya ... nothing to say more, just post something here, that a man sit in his own room in Saturday afternoon,  lack of mood to do anything.

Hope world peace,  see-ya

Worry about our world, our future, everything getting worst

The current situation on this days, everything happen on this world are getting worst.

I m very hurt when I read about the news happen in London, 3 kids pass away because of crazy killer.

This make me remember every news in the pass about kids pass away because of crazy human.

I use to be no any feeling about kids, but now days I changed.

Just because now days living with a kid in my house, my niece.

She just 4 years old when I m writing this.

Somehow read a lot kids incident news, I keep worry on her everything.

She quite love to play with me, sometime quite annoying me but still, she just a kid.

Alright

Move on another worst thing I worry about.

War.

I know that is far from my place, but this actually affect a lot this world on finance and economy.

I quite worry about my income, I still need pay loan on my house.

No matter Ukraine vs Russia, or Palestine vs Israel, I just hope them stop.

Those innocent people are getting killed everyday.

Let those soldier home sweat home.

Politics are dirty, we don't need jump in the mud pool with those dirty politician.

Everyone need live peacefully.

Somehow I m get rid of religion.

I believe mostly people didn't totally understand their own religion.

There just believe those invisible power of their own religion can help them get rid of everything worst. But for me, I m just believe in myself, or learning from relationship.

I hold my destiny by myself, I responsibility on every decision I made.

No more blame everything no more OMG.

Just try to solve the problem ASAP once shits happen.

Just because I feel, religion cause lot of worst thing happen in history.

I still have hope for this world.

Hope for world peace.

The local KFC may disappear in future

 I can't really say I love to eat Kentucky Fried Chicken, but is really worth to taste.

Fried chicken actually is not a food for everyday.

But for party or somehow celebrate something or some special moment, I might choose bucket of fried chicken from KFC.

Also, KFC is my first ever fast food in my life, I still remember in day of 1990, I having dinner in KFC for the first time.

But in this year, our country had some activities that boycott everything from USA, almost half year this happen and still hot situation.

However some merchant immediately respond  to have more promotion and change their path to survive in this situation.

KFC actually facing some problem of management several years, so the quite late make respond on this situation and facing critical finance problem, currently already shutdown lot of franchise branch.

Luckily, the most nearby my house KFC still survive, I decided to have some support on weekend that having my lunch takeaway.

I can't predict the future, I don't know how long KFC will survive in Malaysia, so I should cherish while KFC still they.

Sad.

Hope everything get well, NO WAR, WORLD PEACE.

Waiting my take away in weekend morning

This order machine just added currently

Fried chicken, wraps, burgers, some drinks ...

2024 is a super busy year, late update

 Yes, just beginning of 2024, I keep work overtime many weeks until May.

This make me feel that 2024 just speed up time flow.

Just in a blink of an eye, almost half year pass.

I think, as elder as my ages, this much obvious feel.

Just Chinese New Year,  my old high school classmate had pass away, Rest in peace lady .

I started think about my life, how much time I left.

But after this I keep busy with a bunch of work task and didn't think about that negative thought.

Sometime, keep busy is just a kind of pull everything back to my normal path.

Also, because I keep busy, I still unable to move in my new house.

Didn't have much time to tidy up and arrange everything of my new house.

Oh ya, just beginning of May, one of my colleague resign, she had been work in this company for 10 years, this is just surprising and some sort of sad for us, after this our work will much more busier.

I really hope to have a holiday, but I can't run away from my responsibility think.

That's bad.

Today I hurt my knee while repairing my leaking roof.

Also I just build up my solid wood bed rack, that is nice, I love solid wood furniture.

Hope I can move in this year, hope......

I hope I still able to write anything after this ......

That's all

Left a note in last day of 2023

 Finally, the last day of 2023.

Conclusion of this year: I m lazy, my body get worst, lack of exercise , didn't get more income this year.

And again, I got 2nd time covid19 this year, feel worst that week.

My new  house still not move in yet.

My new house kitchen still raw yet.

Everything is getting expensive.

But income didn't increase much.

I drink a lot tea this year than coffee, I think this is good.

I buy a lot of cups and mugs this year, feel like I got new hobby that collect cups.

I more enjoy every entertainment this year than working freelance.

That's mean I spend more than earn.

May be I feel too stress.

Some sort of stress that almost getting 40 ?

I don't know, but I try to do better everything, include my life.

But this world is not that simple.

Hope everything get well in 2024.

That's all. 😁

After left this note, just realize the sky is gotta rain I should go get my bed sheet inside.

Death topic keep show up to me this few years

 I keep facing the death, relative elder death, old friends death, same age celebrity's death ...

I keep thinking about what happen after the end of me.

I keep thinking, nothing left after I gone.

No any prove that I existed.

When I gone, how about my collection stuff ?

When I gone, my precious memories all gone ?

When I gone, any relative will miss me ?

I started think I might left something, perhaps like some life photo, some notes, some memories notes.

I know as a human being, getting old will make u forget everything.

So I started to plan, I will write down my whole life memories as much as possible, at here, this platform.

Even there is no any visitor here.

But at least I left something on internet database.

I think I might write from my earliest memory as I can remember.

I have lot of awkward childhood memories, this might became my book title if I wish.

Some share memories with sibling, sister, brothers, they might already forgot but I still remember some details while play with them in childhood times.

What a good memories even there is some bad thing happen sometimes.

At the end, I will say I might became lazy again about this plan.

But I try to write it down as much as I can, for real.

Good luck for everyone who work hard for better life.

Oh ya, my English actually no that good for describe some details, so I will write in Chinese.

Probably next month will done chapter 1, or may be prologue ...

See ya.

Grandma & me at Kampung Baru, town of Lunas, Kedah state, Malaysia

(Photo taken in 1987)

Stress, on everything, real bad time

I m currently drop into a trap that trying to get out from this mess.

I m fear about marriage, I m confuse that did I really want to marry her ?

I m fear that if I marry her will cause a lot of problem with my family ? Especially my mom ?

She didn't care a lot my family connection.

I m confuse when my mom force me to marry her ASAP and this really make me gloomy.

I started to doubt myself if this was what I wanted.

I don’t even know why I have self-doubt like this situation.

I started worry everything.

I got little health problem right now.

My heart keep feels uncomfortable sometimes.

I afraid of noisy human sound.

I wish to have a completely silent place to stay.

I started fear if I really have capability to done my house loan.

She didn't make any help on my house loan.

I keep thinking of death topic every morning when I wake up.

What will happen if I suddenly disappear from this world ?
I think might no body care, I m nobody.

I sad, I have no best friends to talk to.

I have some friends, but I fear to show naked of my heart to them.

When I realize, there is already build up huge wall stuck myself inside.

I don't know how to break that wall.

I m hard to believe in human.

I m so hard to say I m sick inside.

What can I do is just empty my brain every morning.

I don't want listen any content when I drive to work.

I look up the clear sky, I free up my mind.

I need some real rest, without any disturb.

I hope I would free my mind in future.

 I love look up the clear sky every morning when I walk to my car that ready drive to office

After release from lockdown covid19, first little trip

On September I went to a town in middle of the west Malaysia called Taiping.

As I know this is a city named under Chinese word, it means "peaceful".

Taiping is a place that we call "Rain city", because this is the place that keep raining and make it most rain fall city in Malaysia.

As you can see the first photo, since I reach hotel, the sky looks ready to rain after this.

Quick snap from hotel room balcony.

I went Taiping together with my dad and mom, with my brother.

We went to the famous spot of Taiping called Taiping Lake Garden.

Even I visited this place when I was kid several times, now days pay a visit as a 30+ mature man, that really different feeling.

Those rain trees getting bigger so much and became nature art branch.

The temperature is comfort, around 24 degree celsius.

I walk around and getting little rain when I snap some photo.

Big rain trees beside Taiping Lake walkpath

Taiping Lake, a bridge across it.

Some how those rain trees look thirsty

We came here also for a wedding dinner somewhere near the lake.

Just a little short trip on weekend, I didn't take extra leave on work.

Head home on next day morning after breakfast.

Actually is just 1 hour 30 minutes drive time from my house.

Is good to have a weekend relax far from where we live.

Hope for next time.

Since 2023, I keep speed up

Walk from my new house to old house by the sunset 

Since last post, I say might diary myself through youtube, but I really don't have lot of time.

After chinese new year I rush on every work task.

Also keep continue my new house renovation.

In now days, renovate a house cost a lot, every costing out of my plan.

So just keep pushing myself to earn more.

She didn't get fair salary on new job, so I didn't ask her to support on this part.

I m getting lot of weight this few month.

Lack of exercise. 

Since after release from pandemic that available  go oversea, I still didn't take any action for my vacation.

I feel stressed. 

Hope can have some vacation end of this year.

Ya ...... that's all

Life is hard // Should I diary myself on youtube ?

A small flower grow out from crack beside my new purchase house car porch

Sometimes I feel uncomplete for just write something on this platform.

My literature skill and grammar are worse as u can see on this post or previous.

So I plan to record speaking video on myself to record everything I feel on that moment, to check whether is it I need some psychology therapy and get back my easy lost past memories.

What language should I speak is the main problem.

Or just mix them together I think.

Cause I didn't do this for audience just for myself.

And try to avoid to see my face.

Ya, I m no that good looking just and an ordinary Asian.

Once I done might make another post on here, even here totally no view at all.

"Siok sendiri"

That's all, bye, chibye

A challenge to build my own nest from empty

 Well, I get the key to enter my new house on last week.

And first thing need to do is searching for renovation consultant.

And bad thing is, step in September, lot of construction already beginning due to done renovation before next Chinese New Year, I'll been late on this.

Luckily found a renovate consultant yesterday, he immediately came over to take some measurement and work on quotation.

Also, plan to build myself for some part as I can, cause lag of budget ...

Exciting to have new living environment on next year.

Hopefully can done move in before next Chinese New Year.

I bought a house

After few years searching finally I decided the first property choosen.

Single story landed house with small space beside.

Is a semi-detach house.

Location in a small town but near the expressway exit.

Is not a new property, this property almost 30 years but still looks good.

Now every document and payment had been done and just wait for keys from lawyer.

Finally I got my own secret base.

Yeah 

Finally my turn [I infected covid19]

A normal day that going office and home without go anywhere, I infected.

My throat feel pain and flu heavy.

This is really bad time to get infected cause my work task is just a lot and all urgently deadlines ...

Soon I get well in about 5 days.

3 days checked positive and other all negative. 

My mom and brother's wife also infected,  we don't know where we infected from.

But luckily all member didn't get worse and cure fast.

This is really bad, hopefully whole world get free from corona virus early.

I still waiting to travel again.

Peace

年齡 - 經歷 - 改觀

*Random photo somewhere near my house

2022了，老實説我一直在延遲結婚的打算

每次想起結婚的念頭，耳邊都會響起朋友的話語：要好好考慮這個選擇啊

不知道是不是交往多年，感覺開始理解所謂七年之癢這類話題

她也沒有催結婚這回事

倒不如説她對於結婚這回事比較佛心，甚至沒有任何打算

關於我自己的未來計劃，是創造自己心儀的房子

在建築設計行業多年，多多少少都有憧憬設計獨特的住家給自己住

然後退休養老

人也就這樣過一生了

小時候還打算過個完美的人生

直到結婚年齡才知道，這一點都不簡單

一切都是錢

我把錢看得太不重要了，導致我現在都沒什麽存款

今年是虎年，正好又是本命年

在上個本命年時完全沒有想到下一個本命年是那麽煎熬的度日

呵呵

這些年看到不少親戚和朋友提早離開世界，多少都有些改變了我的心境

更加珍惜擁有的一切，人走了帶不走此生的物質

購物欲望也減低了不少，存款在疫情開始慢慢儲蓄起來

希望可以早些完成夢想：住進自己精心設計的夢幻屋

2022 好好生活，共勉之

Because of pandemic I long time didn't see my girlfriend

Keep work from home

Keep stay at home

But the pandemic seems no able to slow down in Malaysia.

Our govement seem put more afford on their position rather than people's health and economic.

Bad time in Malaysia now.

I got plan to marry my girlfriend this year ...

Seem everything every plan gotta delay year by year ...

Save Malaysia yourself, stay save

I m ready to step further on 2021

An image snap last night thru the west on 8th days on Chinese New Year 2021

Finally this blog get update on year 2021.

Next month I will become 35 years old man.

Is totally didn't think this far while I started this blog (even there is no people see me blog)

But I still like to write out my feeling here, I don't really like write anything on facebook status now.

2021 should be my most important year, I think should step another further on this year.

I m ready, world.

Let's roll ~~~

Sometimes I missed the old times

Just a random photo in front my house

Too many things happen in this year, change a lot if my life target schedule forcing me to move faster.

I hope I can buy a house on next year.

Because of covid19 my girl friend lost her job.

Somehow I gotta help my brother take care of his baby girl while I m st home.

This current stressful life make me always think back the old days.

Think back those Japan travel times.

Think back old company life.

Think back college time.

Think back concert time.

Sometimes I keep forget those life experiences. 

Or just like lost memories.

I m afraid to lost those precious memories. 

So I keep think back and miss the old times.

I started pick as more home freelance job as I can in this few month.

I can feel my body getting tired.

My hair is getting fewer.

Can't sleep well almost every night. 

Issit my limit here ?

No, next year, still need more.

Because of COVID-19, this should be my longest time stay at home

The place where I stay called Malaysia, this country had been starting proceed a law called Movement control order, starting from 18 March 2020 for 14 days. But after almost 7 days those diagnosis patient still keep upraise, our govement decided to extend more 14 days. That's mean it will be lockdown whole country all activities, everything gotta stop by 28 days, almost a month.

Bad thing happen, income gone if for those people who can't proceed to work from home.
What can I see is those 3s job such as cleaner, they originally low income and no a lot money keep in bank. They will waste a month of time and those money. I had seen on facebook those poor family getting panic cause their not enough money to buy their children a meal and crying when police asking them why they don't stay at home, sad.

For my case I still can work from home for just using computer and online access, salary still stable for a this month (March).

Some of old human here didn't want to follow the law, they still like to go out every way as usually they did.

Those courier job still do their job, chance to get sick of this type of worker are higher in this period, they deserve a better salary and respect.

What had I do on the weekend of lockdown ?
Watching movie, jumping rope 100 times, watch youtube ...... is quite boring.

I think this will be my longest period stay at home record.

My car didn't startup engine for almost 8 days.

Those animal goes on the street because less cars and more save for crossing.

Air in morning more fresh ... but still hot in Malaysia.

However, I hope everything will be fine.

I hope human, will learn a lesson on this disaster.